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Love Addicts Anonymous

Step 6

"Were entirely ready to have God remove these defects of character."

The key words in this step are "ready" and "God." Sometimes were are not ready, even though we want to be, and other times we want to do it ourselves without God.

Love addiction is insidious. It does not let go of us and we cannot let go of it without help. Our character defects (bad habits) are also difficult to let go of. We may like some of them and hold on despite the fact that they are undermining our self-esteem. For example lying and stealing may be lucrative habits that we aren't ready to let go of. If we have thoroughly worked the steps up to now, there should be some willingness to become a better person. This is enough. We do not have to work this step perfectly despite the word "entirely." This step is a bridge to the next and so if you are willing at all you can proceed.

While fear and habit hold us back, we may also still be of the belief that we can become better people by sheer will power. If you still believe this then you must go back and work the previous steps again. Members of LAA are people who believe we need the power of God to lift our obsessions. Not everyone needs divine intervention, but we do. We are "powerless" without help and without our Higher Power. So admit to yourself and another human being that you are ready to have God remove your shortcomings and move on to Step 7. If you can't do this then stay with this step until you are ready. The day will come when you see that your character defects are standing between you and your happiness and you will be happy to ask God to help you surrender them.

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© Love Addicts Anonymous, 2004